Saturday, July 09, 2011

Drawn to the Dark Side of True Religion

For the better part of 10 years I have worn Lucky Brand jeans exclusively. As a tall, wiry guy they fit me without making me seem stick-figurish. I recently read an article in "The Wall Street Journal" about True Religion brand jeans and, since the stores are in the same block, I decided to drop in and try on a pair of American made jeans that retail for between $240-320.00.

I admit to being somewhat high maintenance and possessing more than a bit of metrosexual DNA. It's an interesting dichotomy for the members of my veteran's motorcycle club that I ride a Harley, have been in my share of street fights, and revel in transitioning from shanty Irish to Lace Curtain, (only difference is that Lace Curtain Irish take the dishes "out" of the sink "before" they pee in it) but still care about designer jeans and hair care 'product'.

While lunching outside on pate and salad Nicoise I decided that I HAD to have a couple pairs of True Religion jeans. Of course spending $569.00 on two pairs of jeans may seem outrageous to more than a few people, but who am I to argue with the price of American made products? After all, I can wave the flag with the best of them. God bless America I always say.

Okay, so by now you've all figured out a few things about me, so it will probably come as no surprise that I am a city kid born and bred. I don't like nature, windy country roads, dirt, fresh air or trees. In fact, if I never saw another tree unencumbered by concrete I'd be perfectly content. So, lest someone decide to comment that $300 jeans are worthless as work wear, please note that I do not intend to wear them anywhere but out on the town. I am an urban, rather urbane sort and True Religion and I are well matched for a lasting relationship. After all, my penchant for black coffee (the same as I like my women, hot and bitter) and Marlboro Red cigarettes needs some refinement. I am Truly Lucky to have found jeans that completely fill that niche.

But what about the Lucky Brand you say? Well allow me to assure you that they will not be relegated to Goodwill or engine repair. Thank goodness because I truly don't like getting dirty. My Lucky jeans will remain in the rotation. So, if you see me ambling about town or roaring around on my bike you could wager that I'd "probably" be clad in Lucky Brand. That is, unless I hit the lottery which will find a new mistress, 7 for All Mankind jeans to mesh with the others. Just think of me as a crazy "Big Love" kind of Mormon and designer jeans as my wives. For now though, True Religion will become the expensive girlfriend to my Lucky Brand wife. Ah, it is good to be so free.